The Path of Healers in the Craft
Back in the day, there were no “Reiki” lessons or crystal healing classes available like there is now. Occasionally, if you were lucky to be in a somewhat metropolitan area that had a “counterculture” hub, then there might be a few yoga classes or a few reclaiming herbalism classes.
What we basically had was “spiritual healing”. Sort of like being thrown into a pool of water and not knowing how to swim and hoping that you didn’t drown yourself or someone else while you were figuring it out. If you were fortunate, as I was, then you had an experienced “swimmer” near by to explain the basic techniques. When there was a healing to be done, you did it. You took a few minutes to put yourself in a proper place (spiritually, mentally, and physically) to do it and then you just did it.
I have to chuckle a little sometimes (and yes, this shows my age) when I do a healing and someone asks if I do reiki and I simply reply, “Nah, I just do it.” The looks on the faces are quite funny sometimes.
Honestly, being a healer of physical ails, it is not my forte. I suppose you could say that I am a spirit healer and I wander between worlds and point people back to their path if they get a little misplaced in the forest. Whether they chose to return or follow their path or not is entirely up to them. Sort of like a gas station in the desert. You still have to travel through the desert, but you can get revived and get your bearings. Healers and spirit workers have a bit in common. Just different purposes.
I have noticed a trend, though. It seems that I run into quite a few people that indicate that they are healers of physical ails, which I think is marvelous. We need as many healers (in whatever method they decide is best for them) in our pagan communities. However, I have also noted another trend. Healers who won’t heal.
The usual excuse is that they are not in a good place for it. Sometimes I can agree with that, but if you are on the path of the Healer, then you are supposed to heal. When I see a proclaimed healer not healing day after day after day and time after time, it is disturbing. If that is a person’s path, then it is important to remember that others are RELYING on you and your ability. Warriors need healing. Spirit workers need healing. The job of the healer in our community is to support and keep others in a place where they can do their job.
If you have a counselor who is incapacitated with a migraine, how can they perform their service if they can’t get past the pain? How can a warrior defend or others feel that they are protected by the warrior if the warrior can barely move? All our paths are intermingled and we are supposed to support each other in our Service to Her. When one person decides to refuse to function (in whole or part) on their Path, then (1) a gaping hole in Service begins, or (2) someone else has to leave their Path to fill the gap temporarily, or (3) someone has to pull double duty and do their path and yours.
I find that more and more, I have to jump from spirit work into healing, and this usually happens when someone says they are a healer and then they say they won’t heal. I can see the spirit pain that is keeping someone from their path and, in my path, I feel often compelled to pull double duty so to speak, so that the person I am supposed to assist is in a position to be assisted.
However, when I do this, I unfortunately realize that I am spending time and energy doing someone else’s job and depleting my own time and energy which should be spent on doing my own job. Does this really help the whole circle? What about the people that get “bumped” because I don’t have time? Someone always has to pay the price in the Circle when someone refuses to do their Service.
Similar to assisting at festivals or gatherings — if you are going to volunteer and put yourself out there as being able to do something, then do it. Everyone will understand a temporary excuse, but repeated excuses? If you aren’t a strong healer, but you have the calling to that Path, then train and PERFECT YOUR ART and, in the meantime, volunteer or serve in another path in which your strength lies or in which you have competency.
When to Heal and Not to Heal? There will be a certain amount of people whom you can’t or shouldn’t heal. Sometimes, you can try as hard as you can and it won’t take because of this. But if you are spending more time avoiding healing than healing and you are a Healer, then this is not a proper excuse. Something is wrong and you need to look for the answer. It may be confidence. It may be a training issue. But you won’t be able to fix it, if you don’t look for the problem.
If you just did a healing and are still shaking off any residual or recharging, then heal yourself first. Tell the person asking for help. They understand and they will wait, give them herbal directions, or send them to another healer. But, please don’t leave they standing there suffering. Keep in mind, it is very difficult from some people (such as warriors) to even ask for assistance in the first place. Last thing they really need is to be “blown off”. A good proportion of warriors won’t ask a second time.
Remember, words have power. It is a pitfall to claim to be something when you are not or do not feel that you are. When this is done, then you have already set yourself up to be ineffective and unproductive, not to mention having distracted yourself from your true Path and abilities.
Brightest of Blessings upon the Healers and those who find the strength to serve on their Paths.
Mead Muse
The Thing About Seers
I have also been very contemplative lately. I got another comment that someone wished they had the same abilities as me. Sigh. No they don’t. Really, they don’t.
It is very difficult in terms of societal and personal relationships. At first, they think it’s neat you know stuff about other people, but then they realize the common fear that you might “know” things about about THEM. When someone realizes you have some kind of abilities, you have a pretty good chance of them looking at you almost as if you are an invasion of privacy. Sometimes, they avoid you because they don’t want “anyone” to know something about them.
And, even if you let them know you know things, you have to tell them you don’t know as much as you do or they start becoming obsessed with how much you know and what you can see. Not just once or twice, but they will ask over and over and over and over and over. Or even worse, they try to turn control of their lives over to you instead of living and experiencing their own life. Truthfully, I’ll point out something if it is critical or if it is something which can be altered. But, even if I might know you will eat oatmeal tomorrow, I don’t care. Nope. Checking the Care-O’-Meter and nothing is registering. Just don’t care, don’t want to care, and don’t want to waste time on it either.
Truth is that, yes, I know different things about people and I rarely even speak to the other person about it. Most of them don’t want to hear it anyway because they get so lost in themselves and their adamant perception of “completely autonomous individuality” that they only want to believe that they are the ONLY ones that have ever felt a certain way.
But the truth is that almost everyone has the same or similar emotions or thoughts at one time or another as other people even when they are trying to portray otherwise in the mundane world. The biggest difference that Seers have from Non-Seer people is that oftentimes they have usually the lost the ability to even pretend that most of their emotions are “uniquely individual”.
Here is an analogy for those who are spiritually oriented. Have you ever wondered if spirits watch you when you pick your nose or go to the bathroom? Yeah, everyone does. They do. They just don’t care. It is such a common thing, that it doesn’t even elicit much notice, if any at all. Everyone picks their nose and everyone goes to the bathroom in the mundane world. So, if everyone does that why does a person get freaky that someone or something might “think” that they do it, too?
Alright, since I seem to have turned to a little wytch bytching, I am going to put out my biggest pet peeve involving people that know I am seer. Is it will you see for me? No. Is it can you help me understand this situation? No. Is it does everyone have these feelings? No. Is it can you train to become a seer and how can I do it? No.
It is the lazy people. The ones that stop speaking or only drop the tiniest of snippets and expect you to spend most of your time “knowing” what they are thinking or feeling. Even if I love you, stop it. It really isn’t fair. Speaking is a human courtesy to people like me. If you are “expecting” me to spend all my time reading you, then it really is just rude ~ not to mention tiring and boring. I have mixed feelings with people like this, but the most common ones are
(1) Why is this person so egotistical that they think I want to spend all my time reading them as if I was their personal psychic servant?
(2) Great. One way communication where someone is afraid that if they actually “say” something, then they have actually “said” it and have to take responsibility for saying it. [But this way, they can always pretend that I got it wrong and then admit I was right four months later and have questions after they had already tried to devalue my abilities to avoid or hide an issue.]
(3) If I have to spend all this time doing this with the living, I might as well just have spirits for friends or acquaintances.
(4) Am I some kind of party game amusement or is this just another nutty ‘let’s keep testing her” forever game?
(5) And occassionally, it’s this one ~ Yeah, I know you have some kind of “feelings” for me. Can’t you just ask if I want to discuss it. You know, like…um…grown ups?
As for knowing another person’s feelings. Feelings are feelings. Actions are actions. Even the best trained people cannot always control their feelings, but we can CHOOSE our actions regarding those feelings. Feelings do not mean you WANT to do something about it either. Yeah, I usually know how someone is feeling about me, but I will not usually interfere with their deniability either.
I don’t want anyone to be uncomfortable because I know. I just don’t like it when it goes on for awhile and someone knows I know and won’t discuss it. Not fair that you don’t know what I am feeling? Here, I will help you even the scales. Ask me.
Humans speaking to other humans is the communication of the mind which clarifies and applies discernment to what the spirit and the heart is usually already communicating between people.
Spirit Chatter, Headaches, and Loud Talkers
Today, I have a headache.
The spirit world has been very loud and chatty today. I notice that when certain alignments occur and dead dudes are more communicative, the living begin talking louder and faster as if they are competing with another person to be heard even though most of them don’t ever realize what they are competing again. Of course, we cannot forget the non-dead spirits that communicate as well.
Funny part is that you can shield the dead dudes and the spirit communications, but the living can be far less polite and when they are competing with elevated spiritual chatter, you cannot seem to get them to understand that they don’t have to elevate their own voices. I figure it’s sort of like coming off an airplane and people speak louder because they can’t hear their own volume. Funny part is that they don’t even know they were on an airplane. They just do it.
Humorous in an ironic fashion, but it has given me a headache.
Ramblings on an Elder Wytch
What I particularly find annoying is others trying to force their perception of who and what I am on me and trying to make me conform to their perception to “prove” worthiness. I don’t ask or expect anyone to accept, follow or agree with everything I say. In fact, it’s creepy when someone does that.
Honestly, I already know who and what I am and where I am going. If someone else doesn’t know for themselves, I think better time would be spent on finding those answers for themselves rather than getting off track by focusing on every little thing a teacher/elder does. I don’t live my life by trying to qualify my worthiness. That is just another pitfall and trap that teachers and elders often get stuck in by others trying to pull them off their path. Not always, but sometimes you will find that others are attempting to strive ahead, not by working on themselves, but by “lowering the bar” to a level of mediocrity so that they won’t have so far to travel. This does not serve any of us in the long run.
The Path is not about memorizing every little thing and it’s not about conforming to every little thought. Any worthwhile Path (in my opinion) should be about expanding your capacity for thought, logic, spiritual connection, and expansion of your inner self. If we wanted to be mainstream and sheep, then there are much easier places for that instead of trying to mainstream and conform what is meant to be maverick and different and off the beaten track.
A good teacher or elder is a guide to paths of expansion and not every teacher is for everyone. I have a motto, “You can find enlightenment in a pile of shit IF you truly are seeking enlightenment.” If someone is not for you, walk away. If you truly are seeking enlightenment, the guides (mortal and spiritual) you are supposed to have will come to you. Not saying all teachers are wonderful or properly motivated, mind you, but just want to point out that sometimes it is the perception of the Seeker that causes the problem. I have had some crappy elders and teachers in my time, but I have learned something from each and everyone of them especially the crappy ones.
YOUR journey on the Path is YOUR journey, not mine. You are responsible for it. You alone.
Sometimes, finding out what you want and who you are involves a journey of finding out what you don’t want and who you don’t want to become, eh?
Elders and teachers should never be considered the ultimate defining sources of anything and the misplaced perception that they should be is a great stumbling block to a lot of seekers. They get lost in looking for ANSWERS rather than PATHS to finding their own answers.
That’s one of the really wonderful parts about most traditions. After you are done with your studies, you are more than welcome (and often encouraged) to go out, start your own group, and do it your way. You can finally eat dessert before dinner if you want to. But you might just find out that others are trying to convince you that it is inappropriate for you to do that! LOL!
Serving in Her Garden
Serving in Her Garden
I have always taught that everyone travels their own path even if they are with a group. The benefits of being in a group, pack or coven is that there are others who may specialize in areas which are not your area of strength and so that you can offer your area of strength to facilitate their growth in their areas of weakness with the ultimate goal that no one has a weakness. The group setting is supposed to be fertile ground for each member to grow in.
There is no point where anyone should stop growing for long periods even for elders. If the ground is no longer fertile for elders, then, as farmers do, we will add new crops or rotate crops for the fertility of the ground so that all the crops are abundant.
But occasionally, weeds and kudzu do get into your gardens. It is the way of things. And those weeds and kudzu must be weeded and removed to maintain the harmony and balance of the fertility of the land.
For those unfamiliar with kudzu, it is an oriental vine that was introduced by the government because it provided quick ground cover to prevent soil erosion as a result of infrastructure construction and foresting issues. However, the problem with kudzu is that there is no end to the demands that it makes. It grows insidiously and attempts to take over everything. It grows up trees and buries them from the sunlight and absorbs the nutrients the native plants need to thrive. It slowly suffocates every thing that it can get a grasp upon. So what appeared to be a wonderful addition to the garden ended up almost destroying everything and tries its best to prevent other plants from fulfilling their purpose and service.
People have tried to handle kudzu nicely by trimming it and training it, but it grows so fast and is determined to consume everything in its path that in time, you learn that there is no polite, patient, or kind way of dealing with it no matter how hard you try. You can not change its nature with “white light” and you cannot “heal” its natural instinct and you can not “train” it to be other than what it is. Kudzu.
Thus, the government instilled serious eradication programs including burning and poisoning. Individuals are spending tremendous amounts of time, not producing additional harvests, but battling the kudzu to prevent it from consuming their regular harvest. They struggle to maintain a balance so that they and their land can survive.
Kudzu is also a plant of the Goddess, but it not the ONLY plant and not one suitable for a garden of bountiful harvest. Some things are sent to us to challenge us and to help us grow. Some things are meant by nature for us to battle and fight against so that we can stand by our beliefs and our faith and become stronger and closer to Her.
I stand for my faith and I travel Her path. I serve as Her servant where and how She determines that I should. It is not always easy, but then again She never said it would be.
Attacked by Trolls
I was attacked by trolls.
Sometimes, it is important for us to make those simple admissions. I was attacked by trolls.
I am well educated and a pretty smart cookie in seeing the big picture usually. I have to say that I am usually pretty good at sensing these things and avoiding, combatting, or deflating them before it becomes serious, but they were good and they were tricky. I will witness to you the fact that no matter how long in this lifetime or in past lifetimes you have been on the Path and no matter how far you have travelled on the Path, there will always be pitfalls and beasts you have to watch out for.
This is one occassion where I was tending the path of my students so intently that I was distracted and did not measure my own step. It is a valuable lesson I have learned.
We all know what it’s like having trolls and drama kings/queens in your life. They consume your time first little by little until you start not tending those little things and then it keeps increasing and without really understanding how, you start finding that more and more things that you used to tend to are put aside to do later because you are sucked into the dynamics of the drama. Then suddenly you realize that there is so much to do that you put off that it becomes overwhelming.
The hard part about trolls and dramatics is that they convincingly and so sincerely want you to “help”, “teach”, and “guide” them that it difficult to tell the difference between them and the true seeker with problems. Once the trolls get you helping them with your “white light” though and you assist them, it never ends. It is one more incredible and more time-consuming drama after another. And even when you realize what you are dealing with, you still think that because they SEEM to want your assistance and guidance that you can make a difference.
Then one day or years later, you realize that they DEMAND it over and over. I think one of the best examples of a comment I received was this. But you are an elder and are enlightened, you should forgive him/her and just keep forgiving him/her until they “get” it. Where is your white light? Wow! That was an eye opener for me because when you really, really look at that statement, it means you should permit someone to continue to abuse you until they feel like stopping it and you should forgive and understand and continue to permit that abuse to PROVE your spirituality until then. Wow!
I found that the number one best way to determine a troll is by their giggling. When a troll causes or sees mischief, mayhem, pain, confusion in others. They giggle, especially if they had any part in it. They actually become energized and lively. Other times they seem rather lethargic and even though they may express how how “busy” they are, they actually accomplish very little and suddenly “come to life” and become joyous and gleeful when mayhem and dismay is at hand. Their eyes light up. It’s an expression you will never forget when you see a troll in the midst of chaos giggling.
Another good example of trolling is when they reduce things to subjectiveness. This is definitely a red flag, “But it didn’t FEEL that way.” Test them when you hear this. Ask them for logic. Ask them for reasoning. The true troll will say something like it’s too confusing to understand or I don’t really know, it just doesn’t FEEL that way. (Note, I am not speaking of feeling out spirits or mediumship here. I am speaking in context of normal conversations and discussions.) They say this because you cannot argue with the way they FEEL and they gain control. So logic and reasoning is continually devalued while whatever they FEEL becomes the main focus in decisions.
The other one is logic babble. Throwing out facts and logic in a misleading way so that others do not arrive at the logical conclusion. It’s sort of like math in school. You have certain math guidelines and rules you follow and then you get to Algebra and they show you how on occassion, if you “technically” use the rules correctly, then 0 = 2. Trolls love this! Math teachers show you how to avoid that anomaly, trolls are intent of using that anomaly to advert others. I think some of them actually study these principles of chaos.
However, what makes trolls good at it is that they do not use the principles of chaos for enlightenment but for self-service and to distract others. By tradition, ancient trolls were known for kidnapping humans and taking them to their caves as slaves. I can sympathize. They try to divert you from your Path and from truly assisting others because they want you to SERVE them in THEIR arena. I guess the reasons why are not so relevant just that that is what they do.
The second thing about ancient trolls is that they are not fond of light. They sit around firelight in their caves so they can see a little bit, but they do not like the light of day. And they also like to appear as a regular human being, but tales say that if you are mindful and look closely, you can tell if it is a troll.
Trolls on this plane want your attention, but they do not want to be identified as a troll. They know that they are a troll. They DON’T want you to KNOW and if you do, then they want you to convincingly PRETEND you don’t know. They will throw shiny objects and they will try to distract you from being mindful and looking closely.
Another thing about trolls, interestingly, as with defined abusers is that they want to ISOLATE YOU. They do not you want to see what normal is because they are busy trying to convince you or have convinced you of what they want you to believe normal is and they don’t want all their hard work to be ruined by someone talking common sense to you and saying, “Hey, you know that’s a troll, right?”
They find ways of running off seekers and replacing them with other troll seekers. Changelings. If you find that anyone you want to bring to the group or coven is run off or quickly destroyed, and replaced by a changeling, be highly suspicious of troll activity in your neighborhood. Funny part about this one is that I KNEW they were running off good seekers. I KNEW that they were bringing in someone who was dark and ugly. But I let them CONVINCE me that this changeling needed the light and could be helped.
And, here is an additional thing I have been ruminating for several days now. In Shrek, Fiona is a beautiful princess right? She finally gets the opportunity to be the beautiful princess she was at birth, right? But after spending time with the TROLL she DECIDES and is CONVINCED to choose being a troll FOREVER. She then becomes a booger picking, farting, arm pit sniffing troll and is QUITE HAPPY ABOUT IT. And everyone who loved her could not understand why she choose this and they miss the princess that she was and the royal queen she should have become.
Maybe the moral of Shrek really is supposed to be that if you love someone who is not healthy for you and your future, then you need to learn to not to pursue it any further and to step away from it, rather than condemning your children to being trolls and every generation therefrom into infinity.
TROLLS CAN CHANGE YOU INTO A TROLL if you spend too much time around them. They have a troll virus or something. They WANT you to think that you can help change then or help them to become enlightened because that IS HOW THEY TRY TO CHANGE YOU! All they really need is to keep you exposed to the troll virus by any device necessary for it to be too late to rid yourself of the virus.
That’s how they almost got me. I thought I could withstand the troll virus without even understanding the complexities of the troll virus or having named it. It is insiduous and long term exposure will begin to change you no matter how enlightened you are.
I thank the Goddess every moment now, that there was a spillover from a revealling spell I used to see something else and I began to see all sorts of things revealled around me. If you had asked me if I wanted to see the trolls then, I am not even so sure I would have said yes. I would have given some troll babble about yeah, I know they have long term issues, but they are working on them and I love them (while they are chewing my ankles off).
However painful, I think I will use the revealling spell again. It was not easy escaping the troll cave and I have many mixed emotions because I did dearly love my trolls. But the trolls were not healthy for me, my family, my life, my spirituality. They did not help to keep me strong for my journey on my Path and merely crawled on my back or turned on me when they thought I was at my weakest.
And even when you leave the troll cave, they still howl and yowl. They hide in the shadows and cat call. They try to attack your non-trolls friends and convince them of untruths. I guess they figure if they can’t have you to serve them, then they will try to take someone near you as a replacement. Did I mention that trolls eat humans? Apparently, if you manage to escape the troll virus, then they try to eat you.
And that leads to one more thing, about the trade in myths. The beast/troll tries to take someone you love usually by some trick. I have seen them use their own children on this one. (yeah, yeah, I fell for this one too.) The loved one then falls for the trick by not being aware or choosing not to be aware of the situation. The purpose of the kidnapping is so that you will BARGAIN your LIFE in exchange. Or maybe they just think it’s pulling fresh meat out of the pantry since the last meal ran away. Hmmm. I will have to give this part of the myths more thought.
Thank the Goddess that they underestimated me and may she continue help me learn to see the truth even when I do not wish to see it myself.
